There’s so much to say about this past weekend in Austin, but I’m totally unable to process it into words that would be fully accessible to anyone who wasn’t there…though that won’t stop me from trying.
The National Poetry Slam Experience is so multi-layered, a dizzying mix of emotional, psychological and physical stimuli, that you truly have to be there to fully understand its appeal. Even though I wasn’t competing, you can’t help but get caught up in the competition at some level, and it was a wild ride from the emotional highs of louderARTS’ Thursday and Friday night bouts to the [brief] emotional low of Finals night, when Charlotte’s second round poem pretty much nailed their eventual victory and opened the door to the requisite second-guessing of strategy and emotionally charged critique and debate.
Finals night itself was a mixed bag of individual and group performances with the underlying poetry veering wildly from dreadful to pedestrian to good-but-overwritten to entertaining spectacle to heartbreaking perfection. The latter, and I say so both with and without any bias at all, was Rachel’s performance in the first round which nearly brought me to tears and made me terribly proud to have her as the metaphorical stepmama to my all-growed-up-and-renamed baby, louderARTS. I was a little worried that I’d feel a bit disconnected to the team this year since I only knew Roger and Rachel, but the other three guys — Oveous Maximus, Jon Sands and John “Survivor” Blake — made me remember why slam is still vital and necessary and why it’s so important to keep pumping new blood into the local and national scenes. I got to know each one of them a little bit, via their poetry, brief conversations and watching them interact with the larger community, and I look forward to hearing more from them and getting to know them better in the future. Sands, in particular, struck me as the most like me back in my earlier days, an odd mix of innocence and savvy and a 180-degree game face, so it’ll be especially interesting to watch him develop.
The commentary and debates that followed the Finals tended to fall into two camps — “a lot of the writing sucked” and “it was a good show for the audience” — and as much as I agree with the former, as long as the Nationals is structured and run the way it is, the latter is ultimately what’s most important. Everything else is purely late-night philosophical debate fodder, and until someone develops that long-talked-about next step, a National event where the competitors have met some common, qualitative criteria — as opposed to being random audience favorites of some random judges in a random bar/café — it will remain that way.
And you know what? That’s okay. “Be the change you want to see” has been my personal philosophy when it comes to slam for years now, including that point when I simply walked away. Lead by example; don’t worry about how good or bad the other poets are, focus on what you’re bringing to the mix and don’t compromise it any step of the way. If it’s still not working for you, it’s you not the slam, so just walk away and find another avenue for your work.
From my perspective, Mike, Phil, Sonya, et al put on a hell of an event, from the competition to the day events to the official after-party — hot and sweaty as it was — and I am so glad that I made it out there and got to experience it all again. I had a blast and am feeling recharged and excited. (Well, I’ll feel recharged once I catch up on sleep!) Beyond the main competition, the Nerd Slam was a hoot, even though I didn’t get to quiz anybody on comics since other specialities dominated the event; my Nerd Legends Showcase set showed me I have a long way to go towards getting comfortable onstage again, but also reinforced my desire to get back to that point; the myriad conversations, sincere hugs and “glad to see you back” comments were all fuel on the fire, and while I don’t know that I’ll be slamming with a goal of making a team this season, I do plan to push myself back into competing here and there because you just can’t duplicate that particular rush any other way.
Perhaps most significantly was “getting the band back together”, a much needed reunion that I suspect I’ll look back on several times as the moment I truly got back on the horse and was ready to ride again.
